Every day, parents and educators strive to guide children toward growth and resilience. However, despite the best intentions, certain commonplace behaviors can have unsuspected repercussions on the emotional development of young people. Among them, four seemingly harmless attitudes turn out to be more damaging than we think for the psychological health of our children. Exploring and understanding these behaviors is crucial to forging an emotionally strong and authentic generation.
Comparing is a disservice
In the quest for motivation and excellence, it is not uncommon to hear phrases like “Look how well your brother is doing in school” or “Why can’t you be more like your cousin?” “. But what is really behind this tendency to compare our children to others? Specialists agree on one point: this instills in the child a feeling of inadequacy which can seriously harm his or her self esteem. What seems like a harmless incentive turns into a source of frustration and can lead to toxic sibling rivalries. To value each child in a unique way, it is appropriate to celebrate their personal achievements, without putting them in permanent competition with others.
Emotional validation, a fundamental need
Listening, recognizing and validating children’s emotions are crucial steps for their psychological balance. When a child hears “Stop crying for so little” or “It’s no big deal” too often, he learns to devalue one’s own feelings. This denial of emotional experience can cause difficulty managing emotions in adulthood. It is therefore essential to give importance to the emotions of our children, by listening to them and helping them to express them in a constructive way, thus strengthening their emotional intelligence.
The truth, even when it’s difficult
Protecting children from disappointment is a natural instinct. However, cloaking them in a veil of delusion with well-intentioned lies, such as “Santa didn’t bring presents because he was sick,” can be damaging. Indeed, placing children in a bubble poorly prepares them for the inevitable truths of life. It is advisable to instead promotehonesty and the resiliencepreparing them to face realities, while supporting them in their understanding of the world around them.
When parents’ dreams take over
It is natural for parents to have aspirations for their children. However, when these ambitions become burdensome demands, children can feel pressured to live a life that is not their own. Pushing them to follow a particular path, whether in music, sports or choosing a career, without considering their own passions, can stifle their potential and limit their personal development. Encouraging children to explore their interests and develop their own dreams is essential to their individual development.
To encourage emotionally healthy development in children, it is essential that adults become aware of everyday behaviors that, although common and seemingly harmless, can have long-term consequences. By avoiding comparison, validating their emotions, prioritizing honesty and supporting their individual desires, we are laying the foundation for a stronger, more empathetic and authentic generation. Children deserve an environment that respects and nurtures their uniqueness, because it is by valuing their individuality that we best prepare them to navigate the complexities of life.
